One Moment Please! Love them and leave them...

But don't take them away...

HRH Ariel has been attacked with an old mascara wand on the forehead - court date pending.

When I was growing up I had one barbie and a few barbie clothes - my Parents had no money to waste on such things. I was barbie mad though. I loved anything pink, peach, pastel, yellow, hearts, stars, sparkle, glitter - I was just a very 'girly' girl. I would go over to my friend's houses, and they would have 'Barbie Utopia' - lots of barbies, accessories, everything. And to this day, there are certain 1980's barbies that I look out for on trade sites... 

The very few barbie things that I had, I treasured. 

Fast-forward to present. The Only Child and I have 'Barbie Utopia' - not to be confused with Barbie Fairytopia (which is one part of Barbie Utopia). I treasure this Utopia that we have created - I even had a lovely retired gentleman make my daughter a pink barbie play table, upon which the barbies are slightly elevated (30cm) - making barbie time ergonomically friendly. My very girly Only Child likes it - but I wouldn't say she treasures it, like she treasures chocolate treats hidden away in the pantry (that she finds). Though, she is barbie mad also - what a coincidence...

Singing, guitar playing Ballerina Barbie has been
diagnosed with blue felt tip face.

A few Only Children that I know have a very 'Love them and leave them' relationship with their toys. They want something, they get it, they sleep with it on their bed for a couple of nights, then it is prematurely retired to the play room/toy room/toy chest - whereupon it is not touched till the Only Child notices someone else touching it (say, during a play date with a friend). 'If I'm not playing with it  - no one can!'. 

I watch this toy relationship with curiosity. My Only Child knows there are no other children in the house to play with her toys, so she feels happy to drop or place them wherever she feels appropriate. If my Only Child feels like coloring in a doll's face, or mutating a toy - she knows there is no other child to say otherwise. Mum and Dad might say something, but they don't have the same vested interest as she does. 

And even if a toy acquisition was a long wait - inevitably it will become yesterday's 'it' girl. I know this occurs with most children at some point - with or without siblings. But, could it be that an Only Child has a much more complex relationship with objects? For example, with siblings - you can play with them, or play with a toy. But for an Only Child, there are no siblings to play with - there are only toys (objects). 

Barbie Charm School barbie - very much wanted,
but is often overlooked for good old 80's barbies...

After a period of time watching my Only Child forget about a group of toys - I decided to round them up and give them to a charity shop. I put them all in a plastic bag. At first, I didn't let my Only Child know about this, as I thought she forgot about them. One morning as I went to put the toys in the car - my Only Child saw me, and gave me a wonderfully performed monologue of how it would 'break her heart forever' if I gave them away. It was the first time I had heard her use the word, "heartbroken".

Perplexed, I thought to myself, 'did she just use the word "heartbroken" over a bunch of toys?'. A bunch of toys that she stopped playing with? I said this to her, and was told, "Yes, but they are mine and I love them".  "I understand", I replied.

My behavior growing up towards objects that I loved or treasured meant careful guardianship, checking on them, and cleaning them when necessary. For the Only Child, objects that she loves are to be left somewhere and played with occasionally - as long as they are there. The Only Child's abundance of objects are taken for granted, but loved regardless. Perhaps, not dissimilar to siblings.