One Moment Please! I don't do Teams (Or Vegetables)

Working together - it's not always easy

I have never had an affinity with that saying, "It takes a village to raise a child". It's just not me. The idea of people in the neighborhood constantly helping, offering advice, and dropping in with a batch of blueberry muffins unannounced would start a crazy internal dialogue in my head space. And that's something I can do without.

Some people may love the company of others in social situations, but when it comes to their business - they like to work by themselves. 

Many of the Only Children that I know seem to do okay in team situations, but they don't seem to shine. When my Only Child is put in to a competitive team environment, she just seems to love the company of other children. She is not so concerned with winning in a team sport or team craft, she's more interested in laughing, joking, and playing. And that's understandable - given the lack of siblings.

How to navigate all these children!?

In comparison, some of the other team members are not only children, and they are more than accustomed to the negotiating, in-fighting, hair pulling, and child politics of group situations. To these children, the presence of lots of children in a team is 'business as usual', and they get on with trying to stand out among the crowd. A rare chance if you like, for the 'sibling-ed' child to gain some much needed 'look at me' attention during normal daily life. And that is understandable also.

However, from my observations, only children do seem to shine in solo pursuits - cycling, tennis, artistry, politics, and business. The art of learning and perfecting a skill by yourself, and learning to enjoy it without the company of others - is something an Only Child is very accustomed too. For example, my Only Child may learn a new art technique at school, but it is in her 'solitary confinement' in her room where she perfects it; And inevitably comes running out with a unique masterpiece for Mum and Dad to levitate in awe of. 

Some only children just seem to be more in tune with their intuition by themselves. 

Indeed, we all know a sibling or relative in our family who cannot do anything without an audience, or support person holding a paper cup of cheap orange juice on the side of the road as they drive by. The Only Child has the ability to learn the magnificent art of sustaining oneself in a goal - without the constant drive by their peer group. 

Of course, support from our peers is wonderful to feel - but if we need to feel that support in order to drive or even initiate any of our ambitions... I think we are in trouble.

I realized, that in a competitive team situation, before my Only Child can begin to focus on the skills she needs to deliver in order to be a valuable part of a team - she must navigate the politics of childhood teams. She must learn from scratch the in-fighting, jealousies, whining, and politics of multiple children in a group, that I learnt myself from having siblings. Because of this, my Only Child's true competitive nature is diminished in a team, and she concentrates on making friends and having fun.  

So, I discovered my Only Child doesn't do teams - at least not competitively. 

She also doesn't do vegetables - I'm told she's 'allergic' to them.